Living with a pimp can often look like the Cycle of Abuse.
Your pimp may make promises, buy you gifts, spend extra time with you, or talk about plans on building for your future together. He will apologize for any hurt or damages caused, and promise it will never happen again, or that it is under your control to stop his outbursts.
You may decide to stay or come back, recant any statements made to the police, make plans based on his promises, and feel happy and hopeful about your future together. You may feel resolved to try to be better: work harder, make more money, and display your loyalty and commitment to him.
Your pimp may seem moody, or unpredictable. He may yell, threaten or damage your items or property. He may start or increase drug/alcohol use and seems to increase in overall negativity. He might criticize you
You may try to make him happy, or keep your children away from him so as not to upset him. You agree or go along with what he says and wants to avoid a fight. You may feel like you are "walking on eggshells," worrying about if/when he'll explode.
Your pimp may have a physically violent outburst where he "punishes" or tortures you, your pets, your child, or others in your household. He may humiliate or shame you in front of others, lock you in a room or the house for a period of time, or sexually assault someone.
You may try to reason with or calm him down. You may try to protect yourself and the others in your household. You may call the police or a friend or family member for help. You may leave or attempt to escape.
This cycle may repeat itself weekly, monthly, or yearly. Typically over time, the cycle increases in frequency and intensity. The Happy Household phase after the violent Explosion can make you think that everything is going to be OK "this time." The cycle of abuse does not resolve on its own - the abuser must recognize what they are doing and take steps to resolve it (usually therapy, support groups, treatment for substance abuse, etc.). If the abuser is unwilling or unable to seek help for their behavior, the person being abused must end the cycle by leaving. Leaving an abusive situation is usually a process. It may take going through this cycle many times to not only realize there is a pattern, but to gather the resources and support to exit.